Batterers in same sex relationships use the same power and control tactics as heterosexual batterers. They blame the victim, deny or minimize the abuse, and resist being accountable for their violence. Victims feel afraid, isolated and ashamed, take responsibility for the abuse, and face many barriers in leaving the relationship. Societal homophobia also causes lesbians, gays, bisexuals, and transgendered to face additional obstacles to safety and services including:
- Fear of losing custody of your children, your job, or family support if your sexual orientation is revealed.
- Becoming a target for anti-lesbian/gay violence.
- Extremely limited resources, for you and the batterer.
- Inappropriate, insensitive, and homophobic responses from service providers and the criminal justice system.
- Further stigmatization because of the abuser's violence.
- Ostracism from the lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender communities for revealing the violence.
- Emotional abuse by the batterer, including questioning your "real" orientation and reinforcing society's view of same sex relationships as perverse or bad.
- Threats by the abuser to "out" you to your family, friends, and employers.
- Denial of the existence of same sex battering by referring to the violence as "mutual" battering.
(Source: Domestic Violence Information and Referral Handbook)